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"I'm A Conscientious Objector to the War that's in my Mind"

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Monday, May 12th, 2008
11:45 pm - HA!
SO ... I'm co-directing a play in MK about a bunch of women with mental health problems - this can NOT end well!!

current mood: amused

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Sunday, April 6th, 2008
4:50 am - Theatrical Purgatory
Okay, so I've modified my original opinion. The final result wasn't THAT bad.
A LONG way from good, there were some almighty cock ups. But we got through it. Just.

I don't think I've ever been in a play that stressed me out to the degree that this one has. Usually I feel a kind of excited nervousness. This time it was more a sick dread. And I'm still not at all happy with the way I deal with this kind of stress.

But in balance the week has been far more enjoyable than I would have thought possible.

I've just got back from a really great cast party - the group are so lovely and friendly, I am very glad I joined really! I got stopped by the police on the way home - random spot check. I was so scared even though I knew I hadn't done anything wrong. I suppose driving home at 4am did make me quite a target.
I'm not doing so good with the late night driving front recently, I hit a badger yesterday :(

I wish I could sleep tomorrow. But my parents and sister will be here in 5 hours expecting me to take them to church - yawn!

I'd considered going back to their house with them tomorrow afternoon - again! I don't know why I feel this obsessive need to be around my parents recently. It's like I've become a small and dependent child again or something. I won't be going though, I still have drama on Monday even if the show is over - we'll be doing the post mortem in fact - oh joy, I cannot wait!

current mood: relieved

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Thursday, March 27th, 2008
1:13 am - I'm officially nocturnal
I've lost all ability to sleep at night.
I'm getting enough sleep but for the last 3 nights it's been between about 5am and 12pm. I want to sleep earlier tongiht but I'm just not tired because I got up so late.
Grrr, going to have to break the cycle soon I need to get up at 7am on Saturday.

I've found a dress to wear to Jules' wedding. I suppose it will do nut I still feel like a whale in it. And I've got the thinnest cardigan I could find but I'm still going to boil

Hmphhh, I am in a bright and cheery mood tonight. Now, how to occupy myself for the next 4 hours .....

current mood: blank

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Sunday, March 9th, 2008
8:37 pm - severe overload
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I can't cope with another thing right now. My head feels like it's going to explode and my body is in complete shaky adrenaliny got nothing left in it but can't stop moving overdrive.

I haven't left school except to sleep since Wednesday morning
Working hours - Weds 8 - 11.30
Thurs 8 - 9.30
Fri - 8 - midnight
Sat - 8 - 9.30
Sun - 9 - 8

Sound of Music is next Friday and Saturday so this weekend we built a professional set we've hired in and had a technical rehearsal today. It took forever! It looks so good though but the children still need a lot of rehearsing and costume and set changes are taking about three times as long as they need to. But still, it is not your average school play (if we do say so ourselves!)

Reports are supposed to be done and I haven't even touched my form's pastoral reports. I've been told to be second checker for a whole year group as well and didn't have the backbone to refuse. Somehow we also have to do progress reports this week too. Several of my form are at breaking point with too many commitments and I'm supposed to be having one on one mentoring sessions with them to work out how we can fix things (hello, can I have my own nervous breakdown first please!), I'm supposed to know my lines for the play I'm doing in Milton Keynes for a tomorrow deadline (hmmm, yeah right), I have a pile of marking which is threatening to hit my (admittedly low) ceiling very soon and, oh yes, my job is actually to teach children - whoops, can't see myself providing any decent lessons any time soon!

HELP!

*and breathe* - okay, that was surprisingly helpful.

A few good anecdotes from our musical mad weekend.

Set building Friday night

Me: (struggling with the nits and bolts) - "however hard I screw it won't go in"

Stage Manager to Me: (failing to fit under the stage to fix something) - "could you just crawl underneath and bang hard"

Boarding housemaster to the director: (in reference to me hammering nails in a tiny space under the stairwell) - "Oh I see you've hired a gnome for the finer details"

Technical rehearsal

Child to the Sound Manager: (referring to stage mics) - Sir, could you turn me on please
Sound Manager to Child: (again, stage mics) - E, come here and let me turn you on

Me (very stressed) to Annoying child playing a minor part - "J, in the nicest possible way, you are about 154th on my list of priorities right now"
Child (total innocence) "Ok, what number are you up to?"

current mood: stressed

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Sunday, February 10th, 2008
11:43 pm - Quotes Quotes Quotes
I'm a bit of a serial quote collector (as in the silly things people say!). I was reading them just now and they made me laugh a lot. So now I want to post some of the best. I don't know know why cos they kind of need the context. But it's going to cheer me up anyway (I've lost my good mood of earlier and now feel totally blegh - how is this possible?!

August 2007, Soapbox Team Brazil.

[in reference to luggage allowance]
Buffy: I think I'm overweight

Pippa: Did you try that funny grey soap, it was weird
Ysanne: Um, well, you kind of needed to take it out of its grey cardboard packaging!

[in defence of her cheating in a game]
Pippa: Oh well, you wouldn't have won anyway
Shaun: No, it wasn't in God's plan!

[on how to deal with the copious amounts of food our lovely hostesses thought we needed 24-7]
Rachel: Oh! That's how we can deal with all the food: eat until you throw up and still go home thinner!
Me: Yes, that would be called Bulimia!

Me: Patrick esta uma muito mau menino [Patrick is a very bad boy]

[on the ability to not go to the toilet]
Me: I think I'm a camel

[with regards to washing up]
Patrick: Why is it always my turn?
All: Because you never do it!

Mikey: Pippa, do you HAVE to go after EVERY Brazilian guy you meet

[a mistranslation somewhere along the lines]
Ronaldo: When I am ill the hospital put buttermilk in my veins

Me: I think I feel psychotic

[whilst visiting the Statue of Christ]
Patrick: Is it blasphemous if I take a picture of Jesus'armpit?

[both regarding a variety bag of lollipops]
Rachel: Do you want some you can suck and swallow?

Me: Who wants a hard one?

Mikey: Don't itch your boob in front of me please!

[on tidying up our bits of the dormitory]
Me: Buffy, come and be impressed with my area.

[on the etiquette of men's toilets]
Pippa: But people know what you're doing if you go in a cubicle
Mikey: How?
Pippa: Because if it's not a poo you'd use a urinal
Ysanne: Not necessarily, you might be a trans-sexual!

Rachel: Hey guess what, this time last week we were in the hotel.
Buffy: Yeah, I was vomitting in the sink!

Rachel: Yor surname's a good name for a dog
Mikey: Hooch is a good name for a dog
Me: No! Hooch is a children's alcohol!

[trying to get the day written chronologically into journals]
Mikey: Did we do food then Jesus or Jesus then food?
Me: Food then jesus, get your priorities right!

[staring at a tanks full of exotic fish for sale]
Rachel: Are they real fish?
Shaun: No, they're battery powered
Rachel: Are they? Really? They're realistic aren't they?!

Shaun: At least talk in tune.

Pippa: Everything that comes out of my mouth is a blessing to the Lord

[resolving to make the locals more organised in future]
Rachel: Next year they really have to pin the Brazilians down.
Ysanne: And screw them .... um ....down.

Pippa: I quite fancy a munch on a trachea

Pippa: DOn't feed the dog at the table, it encourages them.
Mikey: Yes, that's how we started with Pippa and now she;s sitting up at it with the rest of us!

[on the handling of an ant infestation]
Rachel: There;s even more coming in
Mikey: Where did you spray them?
Rachel: In the hole
Mikey: IN the hole?! You want the ants out of here so you're spraying poison in their home?!

Gilesgate, Durham, 2005-2006. 4th year of university.

[frustration during graph drawing maths homework]
Me: Grrrr! I’m drawing a line of best fit.
Gill: A line of best fit? This is maths!!

[reassurance on being given a school placement in a rough area]
Me: You’ll be fine. The school looks really nice … from the prospectus … cover.

Jo: Oh, I thought my dinner was moving!

Jo: I need a snappy title for this cleaning rota.

Helen: Don’t knock the squashed brownie
Ellie: I’m not knocking the brownie, I’m knocking you!

[guiding Gill out of a parking space]
Me: Yep, you’re clear. Well, there’s a baby in a pushchair but …

Helen: I didn’t steal it, I just silently borrowed it.

Ellie: I feel like a homeless person except I have a house.

Gill: Non-fiction as in stories?

[in a counselling sense]
Ellie: Yes, I think I got through a good 5 or 6 people last night.

Hazel: I don’t vomit in little orange buckets!

Ellie: I hate having hair

Me: I’m sorry Jo, I whistled like a kettle!

Jo: Quiet! We will have … ribena!

Me: Everyone in my ballet class had a bright pink and black Leotard and mine was just regulation RDA.
Jo: What, your Recommended Daily Allowance of lycra?!

Stuart Button (Music lecturer): Please note that when we get to the end of the song the last verse should read ‘when will your arms be worn away', not ‘when will you ars be worn away’!

Me: How do you go about pulling an internal muscle?

Paul: But birds, bees and peas all rhyme

Me: Are you peeling carrots on my floor?
Jo: No! It’s er, an orange parsnip!

Paul: Most girls fancy Ronaldo but I don’t find him very attractive.

Ellie: I have got through 1 back, 3 hips and 20 knees.

Gill (to boyfriend Paul): We were on a break!

Hollie: I just got my finger stuck in his nose

Me: If I ever divorce the nightbus, I’ll marry Tesco

Jo: Sorry, I keep talking out loud

Hollie: He inhaled my hair, it made him choke

Me: I am the evil phantom fail-your-degree fairy!

Me: Oh don’t worry, there’s already about 60 spilt drinks on the floor anyway.
Paul: If there’s 60 I’ll use my lips as a human hoover!

Donna: But that’s all there is to do when you’re young – have sex and go to school!

Hollie: Am I pregnant? No, I’m just fat, this is just a belly, there’s nothing in there!

[in defence of a toastie lunch being called boring]
Me: It’s quite an active lunch as opposed to an untoasted sandwich.

Gill: I think I’m a soprano without being able to sing the high notes!

Nick: I like sweet wines
Hollie (mockingly): like that one you had for breakfast on holiday
Nick: That was you!
(pause) Hollie: Oh yeah.

Jo: I’m feeling very unloved by the ankle manufacturer

Paul: Big boys make you cry, that’s a lesson to learn.

Hollie: I like watching newsround, it teaches me things in simple ways.

Helen: I like to feel my body parts!

Nick: I’ve not got any memories beyond 5!

Jo (navigating): Turn left and drive down the footpath for a bit.

Gill (whilst driving): Ooops, sorry. Wasn’t looking!

Hollie: That is not awesome. Awesome is when you are in awe. You were not in awe of that football.

Me: I’d so get married if I had anyone to get married to.

[about technical 3D drawing]
Me: I was just trying to add some variation!

Jo: The thing about the assasins society is that it fulfils your childhood dreams!

[a crucial replacement of about with like]
Hollie: I’m sick of talking like Jesus!

Me: I’m quite willing to sacrifice my life tomorrow

Jo: So is there anywhere to go climbing in Switzerland?
Dan: Errr … yeah … the Alps!

Jo: My campus card says I expire this year but…

Hollie: Nick ran into a car. It was moving sideways.

Jo: I don’t often say this Becky but you’ve got really good taste.

Hollie: It’s making me big. But I don’t want to be big because then I can’t fit through the hole.
Hazel (months later): Hollie … what hole?!?

Ellie: I’ve got a serious food baby going on here!

Gill: My car’s just insuperior
Hollie: What is the real word?

Hollie: If you find any teeth on the floor they’re mine.

Nick: Oh no! One of my boobs just popped

Becky: Oh, we’ve lost a bit of clay
Paul: Oops. That was probably one of my udders!

Hollie: Do you think flavoured condoms have calories in?
General Concensus: Nah
Hollie: Why not?
Gill: Well. You don’t eat them.
Paul: Lollipops have got calories in and you don’t eat them!
All: What!?!?!?

Helen: Oh no, I just mayonnaised my glasses

[on the intricacies of imitating Hollie's breasts]
Nick: There’s a big difference between enhance and create!

Hollie: I don’t have to eat
Ellie: I don’t have to sleep
Me: I don’t have to do either … well eventually I do!

Hazel: Really really obese people are funny!

Hazel: I love girating on Becky!

Ellie: What are you trying to spell?
Hollie: I!

Me: I got off the nightbus at the viaduct and then remembered I don’t live there any more.

Hollie: I’ve known at least 3 psychopaths in my life
Paul: Well there was a boy at my school who was a bit highly strung …

Paul: You would be pretty pissed off if someone locked you in a cupboard.
Me: I once locked myself in a cupboard
Hollie: I got accidentally locked in the PE cupboard with this boy.

Pete: So everything’s out in the open … but when I stand for Parliament I’m straight okay!

Hollie: Ellie is … horizontally small?
Gill: … Thin …?!?

Gill: I lack coordination on a Saturday

Emily: I’m going down to London this weekend for Crufts
Paul: Are you in it?

Ellie: I don’t have feelings for teabags.

[not being allowed to finish your sentences can be a very bad thing]
Me: On the train home from Manchester I got my first flash …

Hollie: It’s more furry that spiky, even Gill’s had a feel

Me: I trapped myself in my room with a bag of compost

Me: What is he, some kind of super absorber?!

Hollie: He keeps sticking his willie in with nothing on!

Me: I’m incapable of not making a mess

Me: I want to crawl into a small compost covered hole
Hollie: If you did that you might grow a bit!

Hollie: If I was a boy I’d be in love with Ellie. In fact I’d go out with any of you.

Me: It went right through my heart but I didn’t die.

[taking a photo up her dress whilst drunk]
Ellie: I don’t know what’s up there!

[looking at the underwear in TK Maxx]
Me: Oooh, I like the ones with strawberries on. Oh! No, I don’t, they say ‘Bite Me’, I’m far too innocent for that kind of thing!

Word Alive Camp, April 2004

Nat: Hello Ewan. You're looking very brown ... or are you just dirty?
[45 second time delay and study of a green teeshirt]
Ewan: Hello Nat. You're looking very green ... or are you just mouldy?

Ali: But Nat, when you say stupid things, they're really funny
Becca [to Ali]: Whereas your stupid remarks are just stupid!

Becca: What was our conclusion?
Nat: What was the question?

Ali: When my elbow moves my bum moves - it's just a reflex.

Me: Is Good Morning Big Top in the Centre Stage?
Becca: No, it's in the Big Top!

Me: I've got the sense of direction of a confused flea

Nat: Er... someone who knows something?
Becca: Yep!

[non appreciation of my quote recording efforts]
Nat: Becky, you're like some kind of tabloid press

Me: Carbohydrates are like ... the devil of all eatable things ... seriously!

Nat: ALi's usually the grace enforcer

Elaine: dried up ... like a Christian prune!

[in response to my choking fit]
Nat: I feel like I want to pat you on the back. I'll clap instead!

[trying to stage a melodramatic exit]
Jules: I'll just disappear into this cupboard. Oh, it's an ironing board, I'll have good company.

[mid story]
Ali: And it TRANSPIRED that the barman ...

[said whilst flinging her arm dangerously near Nat's face]
Ali: Ooooh, I was reading the 4th Harry Potter book ...
Nat: And THAT'S worth me losing my eyesight for.

[we shared a doube bed]
Jules: Right, I'm going to bed
Me: I won't be long Jules!

[whilst watching Spring Harvest TV]
Jules: That guy looks like a mole
Me: You can't say that, that's way harsh
Ali: Not in a bad way
Becca: Can you look like a mole in a good way?!

Nat: Becca can you chuck me a sweet I'm going to try and get in in Jules' mouth
Becca: What kind do you want?
Nat: I don't care, it's going in Jules' mouth!

Ali: I just tried to drink my camera

[on a search for interesting ideas]
Becca: Are you looking at me for an answer?
Nat: No, I was assessing whether you're a creative person and deciding you're not!

[awards presented courtesy of Ali]
To Becca: The Snail award for slowest eater
To Nat: The Melodrama Queen award
To Me: The Spaced Out award for lack of common sense

Ali: I don't have a problem with touching other people's boobs!

The Viaduct, 2003-2004, Durham, 2nd year of University

Becca: I'm not skiving, I'm having a lie in!

[during a power cut]
Becca: What are we going to do about everything in the fridge and freezer?
Me: Um, plug them back in again!

Laura: We need the 4.00 train to Nottingham
Jules: What time does it leave?

Sarah: Have self control, it's a gift from God
Nat: [evil glare]
Sarah: Don't hit me, I'm scared of you!

[during a game of truth]
Laura: I don't like this game, it causes me to sin!

[a request for frothy hot chocolate]
Hannah: Can I have a bit of a whizzer?

[asking about a friend who I said was on drugs]
Hannah: What does she take?
Me: English!

Hannah's lecturer: There's no such thing as the old testament

Beth: I shared a bed with a gorgeous girl called Sarah

Becca: My hair's still wet from this morning
Hannah: WHy don't you dry in in the tumble .... oh!

[during a quiz]
Me: What country was Kubliah Kahn built in?
Becca: India?
Laura: That's not a country, it's a continent!

[doing the washing up]
Laura: Really sorry guys, there's seaweed in the water.

[trying to decipher a Portuguese Christmas card]
Beth: Oh my goodness, it doesn't even look like English!

Collingwood College, Durham, 2002-2003, 1st year of University

[Caz's description during a game of taboo]
Caz: Another word for wellies
The Answer: Goulash!

Nat: I just realised that my nose sticks out more than my forehead

[in a restaurant]
Me: Can I have Garlic Bread without the Garlic?!

Ali's Maths: a trapezium has 5 sides, 3 cubed is 9 and from pam to Midnight is 27 hours.

[about Hannah]
Me: What? They had to tell YOU to speak UP?!

Laura: The more potatoes yous eat the more likely you are to commit crime.

[trying to understand Romeo and Juliet]
Caz: The friar's Catholic right?
Jules: Yeah
Caz: The how come he's got a son
Jules: He hasn't
Caz: Romeo's his son isn't he?
Jules: No
Caz: Well why does he call him Father then?!

Ewan: I have two pairs of Jeans - one I use for gardening and the other doesn't fit.

Run the Race Speaker: My calling is to eat chocolate with non Christians

[the results of Nat throwing a ball around the room - ir rebounds from face to computer]
Becca: Aaarghh, my computer screen
Ali: Er - aaargh, my face!
Becca - er, my computer screen's worth more than your face!

Jules: It's all just psychotic willy nilly

Essay comment from tutor: It was unfortunate that you didn't do what was asked in this assignment.

Hannah: You CANNOT

Laura: Why don't you give him a toothbrush, not just take the mick!

Jules: I'm a confused bird

Me: STOP! STOP! Tere's a BUS!
[yes Becky, I think the man cans ee the huge bus moving at snail's pace towards him!]

Sociology Lecturer: And guys ... I cheated! I got this lecture off the itnernet and I don't know if any of it is relevant!

Becca: That well known proverb, blah blah blah blah blah

[quotes from the 4 legged fundraiser day]
Ali and Laura: It's easier if you squash Becky!

Ali: I really want to sit down
Laura: Sitting down is not an option

[in APRIL 2003 - first day of term]
Hannah: Happy New Year everyone, it's 2003!

[failure to get sarcasm]
Laura: Ewan woke me up with his hairdryer this morning - curling his hair
Me: What?! Is his hair STRAIGHT normally?! - [Ewan has an afro]

Hallgarth's future landlady: I had these tenants once ... they were a bunch of fatarses!

current mood: amused

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11:06 pm - Mice Wars
I've caught a mouse!!! At last! And it's so small and cute looking I almost feel bad now! It looks very sad sitting there in its trap. I kind of feel like I should go and release it now but I'm tired and in bed so it will have to stay there till the morning. And it has an M&S organic chocolate coin to feed on in there, what more could it want?!

I bet there's more mice though - no way could one of those tiny little things have done all the damage I have seen in my cupboards!

current mood: impressed

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2:55 pm - Sunshine and Rainbows
Actually no rainbows, just sunshine. But it sounds pretty.

Summer has arrived! I don't know whether this is lovely or concerning! Certainly very odd in February but never mind.

It's Half Term - yay!

Had a lovely restful-ish weekend. I went for a walk in the sun yesterday and actually explored the village for the first time really (quite shameful after 5 months living here I know!) The other end of it is so lovely. I found a huge log which has been carved out into a bench so had a wonderfully peaceful time drinking (caffeine free :( :( ) coke and learning Act 2 Scene 1 of the play. Was very nice and all-is-right-with-the-world-ish. I fell over a stile and stumbled into a bramble patch on my way home though. Tights ripped to shred and 3 unsightly looking scratches down one leg - I think this should teach me that trousers or jeans are, just occasionally, a necessary evil!

Last night I was initiated into the delights of Milton Keynes clubbing - and actually it was really good. Far superior club to anything Kendal or Durham has to offer. Everyone was telling me it was terrible but it seemed quite upmarket to me!

I skived the village church today (well actually, I haven't been there for a while - or anywwhere for a while -eek!) and went to see Scripture Union friends at their church this morning. I can't go to their training weekend for this year as it clashes with a wedding. Have ended up agreeing to do the Friday night which somehow gives me a 7 hour drive into Scotland to do by 1pm on Saturday - fun fun fun.

And tonight I am taking the village church youth group to the laser quest - whoo!

I'm actually in quite a good mood today - how novel!

current mood: cheerful

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Wednesday, January 2nd, 2008
10:11 pm - Losing my Intelligence
I'm reading old diaries this week - never a good plana nd it's giving me rather a lot to think about/reasess etc which I think will probably end up being spewed here at some point.

But the one thing I have to say now is - how the hell did I ever get a degree from Durham?!
I've just found my assessment of my finals papers with some of the questions written out.
I wrote an essay with the title:
"In a society whose beliefs and practices constituted a denial of human imagination and creativity it was the poets role to keep open a sense of alternative possibility" Assess the validity of this claim with reference to at least two writers (not necessarily poets) of the Romantic era.
Hmmmm, I got a comfortable 2:1 on that paper. 2 years on and I don't even know what all the words mean!!
Okay, exaggeration I do, but no way could I even begin to answer the question
*sigh*, how very very sad.
I think people really do go into decline post 21!

current mood: crushed

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Tuesday, January 1st, 2008
3:17 pm - From 2007 to 2008
What was the best thing that happened this year?
Erm, I don't know, it's really hard to choose. In hindsight probably getting a new job but I had mixed feelings at the time. So probably going to Brazil.

Did you get your driver's license this year?
No, I;ve had it for 4 years

Did you graduate high school or college?
Nope

Did you get married?
That would involve finding someone to get married to first!

Did you become a parent?
God, no.

Did you become an aunt or an uncle?
No. I think that would be nice but I'm sure my sister would have something to say on that one.

Did you have any run-ins with the cops?
Certainly not!

Did you move somewhere new?
I did - to the wilds of Buckinghamshire

Did you make any new friends?
Yes lots - all the people in the new area.

How many people did you kiss this year?
Discounting pecks on the cheek - just one!

How many people were you romantically involved with?
Again, just one - and that only briefly

Did anyone close to you die?
My Gran

Did you get a new car?
I inherited one formally. I was already driving it though

Did you dye your hair?
Yes, twice - the second time to fix the damage of the pinky blonde first attempt!

Did you go out of the country?
Yes, to Brazil and (less interestingly) to Scotland

What was the worst thing that happened to you this year?
Um, like the best thing, it's really hard to think. Probably no one thing, just a bunch of feelings, reactions and attitudes I wish I hadn't had

Did you go to a wedding?
Yep, just the one.

Did you make a NY resolution at the start of 2007?
Yes

Did you keep it?
No, thank goodness - it wasn't very healthy

Did you go to the hospital?
Not as a patient

What was the best movie you saw in theaters this year?
Erm, I don't go to the cinema enough at all. I think maybe St Trinians actually.

Best book you read?
Ouch, I can't choose just one book! Wicked (the school Head book not the wizard of oz story) maybe, if I had to narrow it down.

Greatest achievement?
Getting my job in Bucks

Are you dating the same person you were dating at the start of 2007?
No

What was the best cd released this year?
I don't even know which CDs were realeased this year!

Are you still friends with the same people?
Well I haven't stopped being friends with the people I was friends with but I don't live near them so don't get to see them much. I have made new ones where I live now.

Did you get a tattoo this year?
No way

How about a piercing?
No. I have my ears done once already and I don't like any other piercings

Did you meet anyone famous?
Darren Gough - I teach his son - help!

Did you get any new pets?
Yes. A hamster (long story but it's dead now!)

The "Lasts" of 2007
Who was the last person you kissed?
Er - my Dad I think

Last person you told "I love you"?
I have never said those 3 words, ever. I don't know what kind of terrible things that reveals about my personality. But in my defence noone other than a 16 year old boy has ever said it to me either (ooop, should stress I was also 16 at the time!!)

The last place you went?
Sophie's house but I can't remember where it was anymore! North London I think.

The last person you spoke to?
Either Hannah, Sophie or Sarah, I don't know which

The last movie you watched?
Pan's Labyrinth

The last song you heard?
um, not sure, something from Hannah's ipod

The last color shirt you wore?
Brown

The last person to call you?
My Dad

The last time you cut your hair?
Erm - November

The last thing you ate?
Toffee icecream with pink Barbie sprinkles all over it - how exciting!

The last thing you drank?
JD and diet coke - blegh!

The last book you read?
The Boleyn Inheritance

The last person you hugged?
Hannah

The last time you went swimming?
3 or 4 weeks ago I think

The last game you played?
Truth - not veru successfully though

The last guy you hung out with?
Patrick - but only very briefly. Properly, a group of boys I went to school with.

The last girl you hung out with?
Hannah, Sophie and Sarah

The last family member you hung out with?
My sister

The last time you went to theaters?
Well, The 3 Musketeers panto was 3 weeks ago but I was crew for that. The last play I actually watched was the Pre Prep Nativity performance!

The last time you went to Walmart?
um, never!

The last person you told "Happy Birthday" to?
"told" as oppose to wrote on a facebook wall - erm, probably a child at school.

How old did you turn on your last birthday?
aaaaghhhh - 23 - and I'm not that far off 24 now - waah!

The last thing you bought?
an underground ticket

The last time you went to the doctor?
August

The last person you dated?
Antony - now, that was successful!

The last restaurant you went to?
some randon Italian in London

The last person's house you went to?
Sophie's

2008 General
What are you most looking forward to this year?
I don't know, I don't know what's going to happen this year! I''d like to go back to Brazil

Will you turn 16 this year?
No :(

Will you turn 18?
No :( :(

21?
No :( :( :(

40?
Not quite yet!

Are you getting married this year?
Haha, certainly not to my knowledge!

Are you going to become a parent this year?
Unlikely

How about an aunt or an uncle?
Again, unlikely

Will you be going to a new school this year?
It's nopt my intention

Will you be graduating high school or college?
No

Do you have any big vacation plans for this coming year?
Brazil, hopefully. I wouldn't call it a vacation though, more very hard work!

What movie are you most looking forward to coming out?
The Other Boleyn Girl

What new music albumn?
I don't know what's coming

What book?
Again, not sure what's coming

What game?
None

Are you moving this year?
Hope not

Are you currently dating anyone?
No

Did you make a NY's resolution?
A couple

Have you broken it yet?
Not really

Did you kiss someone at midnight?
No

Who were you with?
Sarah, Sophie and Hannah

Did you watch the New Year's day parade?
I'm not aware we have one

Do you know anyone getting married this year?
Yes, a couple of people

What time did you get up this morning?
10am

What color shirt are you wearing?
Brown

What do you most want to happen this year?
There's a few things I'd like. But wishes don't come true if you say them aloud!

2008 Firsts
Who was the first person you talked to?
Sophie I think

Who did you first tell "I love you"?
Nobody

Who was the first person you called or who called you?
My sister

Where's the first place you went?
Train station

What was the first thing you ate?
Toast

The first thing you drank?
Water

The first green thing you saw?
A tree?

What was the first electronic device you used besides a computer or cell?
I don't think I have used any other devices yet

What was the first movie you watched?
Haven't watched one yet

Who was the first person to wish you a "Happy New Year!"?
Via text - Leah. Pre midnight!

What was the first pair of shoes you wore?
Brown boots my sister bought me for Christmas

What was the first song you heard?
I don't know if I've heard a complete one yet. Just background noise music

The first thing you saw on TV?
One of the soap operas is on in the background now - Emmerdale I think. Not really watching anything though.

The first thing you bought?
A train ticket

Who was the first girl you hung out with?
Hannah, Sophie and Sarah

The first boy?
None yet!

The first relative?
My Dad picked me up from the train station. Just had dinner with Mum, Dad and sister

What was the first thing you did the moment it became 2008?
Went outside with party poppers and sparklers

current mood: sleepy

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Sunday, December 30th, 2007
2:27 pm - I like Christmas
I like Christmas. It is fun. I like seeing people. I like getting presents too! I like sleeping. I even like spending time with my family.

Ok, enough of the 7 year olds 'my holiday' style essay!

But I actually have enjoyed Christmas this year. Have had Carol here from Brasil which has made it very different but not in a bad way, and hI have genuinely enjoyed being at home quietly with family. Obviously couldn't cope with that all the time - I've also been into the lakes walking and on boats a couple of times, been out with friends sometimes and been to Edinburgh for the day - but, in general, I've been content with the quiet life - this has NEVER happened before! I'm normally going mad from lack of activity at this point. Didn't actually get excited about Christmas (sad, I must be old!) but certainly had a good time once it came.

Ho hum - interestingly, I actually have a lot to say but nothing that I am prepared to say in a fully public entry. SO why I am writing one I don't actually know! Just feel that I haven't for quite some time I suppose!

New Years Eve tomorrow - and for the first time ever I don't think I'm going to be doing anything at all - how coold am I!? But you kn ow what - I don't even care that much!
It's just another year - in all honesty - who really cares?!
But, just because it's an obligatory phrase, - Happy New Year anyway!

current mood: content

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Monday, December 24th, 2007
3:36 pm - praticar Portugues
oi
preciso aprender mais portugues e nao sei como. Agora eu estou escrevendo aqui e Carol esta mudando todos os erros.
Agora estou assistindo televisao mas nao gosto do programma - tao chato (cochilando)
Quero coca diet - mas ja bebi muito!
Nao sei o que falo
Amanha e Natal. Vamos dirigir a igreja de manha e depois vamos almocar. A tarde vamos ter presentes e talvez vamos brincar.
Ontem nos fomos a igreja duas vezes e tambem andamos ao longo do rio e alimentamos os patos. Tambem nos assistimos o filme 'St Trinians'.
Em mais ou menos vinte minutos vamos jantar - eu acho salmon, batatas e vegetais
Antes, eu quase matei o gato dos meus pais. mas ela vai estar ok.
Tambem hoje nos fizemos muitas compras - eu comprei luvas, maquiagem, abacaxi com iogurte
Agora preciso ir
Tchau

current mood: crazy

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Friday, December 21st, 2007
4:51 pm - London Days
Ouch, I hurt all over - feet, back, head, thighs, shoulders - HOW do people cope with London full time?!

I have a friend over from Brazil for the Christmas holidays. It's her first time out of Brazil so of course we had to officially 'do' London. I have an Aunt in Chiswick who let us stay with her so it's been 4 days of non stop activity - I need sleep (and, incidentally, sone more money!)

Ever wondered how much London you can fit into 3 and a half days? How's this for a pretty good effort:

Tuesday - Changing of the Guard at Whitehall, Buckingham Palace, The Tower of London, The Tower Bridge Exhibition, Harrods and an Italian Restaurant.

Wednesday - Hampton Court, Covent Garden, Central walking, Guanabana Brazilian Cafe, Westminster Abbey, Oxford Street (or Road? - the shops anyway!) and another Italian Restaurant

Thursday - Kensington Palace, London Zoo, SHakespeare's Globe tour/exhibition, Picadilly Circus, Burger bar and the cinema.

Friday - The London Eye, a DUCK tour and ther London Aquarium

Ouch!

current mood: exhausted

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Wednesday, December 12th, 2007
10:37 pm - Settling Down
I feel really settled down here now. And, although I do still miss the city and loads of people a lot and would willingly go right back to first year and do the whole uni experience oall over again, I really don't regret leaving Durham. I needed to move away to become an adult and I think I've managed that here.

Socially I'm feeling really comfortable now. I love the drama group I'm in in MK. I was shy and awkward at first but after the pantomime last week and the after show party on Saturday it's great. I think what I've had to get my head round is that, when you're an "adult" it doesn't matter whether your friends are 20 or 60 they're all still adults and you can have both ages in the same friendship group. It seemed impossible for me to have actual friends older than my parents - but now I don't think it is, I actually like it. Obviously I wouldn't like it if all my friends were 30 or 40 years older than me but I love having the balance.

In the village I'm slowly becoming more involved. I helped at the children's christmas party at the village school on Sunday afternoon and I'm helping run the church youth group on Sunday evenings. They're a really great bunch of kids and the other leaders are awesome.

And school is just fantastic. We had boarder's carols round the tree tonight. It sounds cheesy but it was so much fun, The kids all had their pyjamas on and brought their duvets down and each dormitory had prepared a carol. We had a few staff ones (I had to be the page in Good King Wenceslas - eek!) and did lots altogether too. It was such a lovely, CHristmassy atmosphere and I really enjoyed it. I think, despite my so called principles, the private school ethos actually suits me very well.

Anyway, I am happy. And tomorrow morning is boarder's packing so school doesn't start till 10am - whoo!

current mood: cheerful

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Thursday, December 6th, 2007
10:38 pm - Panto Panto Pantomime
Yay first night over.

Only one cock up, not so bad really!

And I had my final lesson obs at school today which was awesone - couldn't have asked for better.

Everything's pretty good really
And now I can sleep

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Monday, December 3rd, 2007
11:54 pm - Too much
AAArghhh - why did I ever ever think that school inspections, report writing and amateur dramatics could possibly mix?!? Panto technical rehearsal just lasted 6 hours (which wouldn't be bad if we had actually done a technical rehearsal but sadly that is not the case!), we have pre inspection tomorrow at school and have I done my planning? - pah, as if!
Oh, and apparently marks are due for our progress reports tomorrow - even though we;ve just written full reports to go out next week - huh?!
ANd I have my final nqt assessment on Thursday morning, deadline for getting my file ready on Wednesday and somehow have to plan an all singin all dancing history lesson.
Dress rehearsal tomorrow, tech/dress/makeup on Weds, performances Thurs, Fri and 2X on Sat
HELPHELPHELPHELPHELPHELPHELPHELPHELPHELPHELPHELP

(Yet, I can still waste time - amazing!)

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Wednesday, November 14th, 2007
9:01 pm - GRRR
I've lost my bank card - grrrrrr!

how intelligent of me - I know I had it yesterday. poo!

Now I have to wait 4-5 working days for a new one. Bah!

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Monday, October 29th, 2007
12:55 pm - Back
It's been a very very long week. 5 different towns/cities, 5 different beds/sofas/floors
I am tired
And I am still entertaining my parents - but they are fixing my house. So I shouldn't complain

My house is cold - hasn't been heated for a week - boooo

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Saturday, October 6th, 2007
11:15 pm
I am going to marry Jude Law. Unless Rachel marries him first. She'll accept Colin Firth instead. I might consider Jonny Depp. Then all will be good.

current mood: awake

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Tuesday, September 25th, 2007
10:06 pm - Wah
Sad and depressed for no reason tonight

wah wah wah wah wha wah wah wah wah wah wah wah

Meh, maybe I should just go to bed!

current mood: depressed

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Saturday, September 22nd, 2007
10:02 pm - Babble Babble
School was just one day too much today. It feels so wrong to have to get up and go in on a Saturday. My teaching was, to put it mildly horrechous. Kids clearly sensed I was in a bad mood which is never good - poor little things, I feel bad for them having to put up with me. In the tradition of the Victorians I pretty much taught from the chair behind my desk, made them get on with work and had them come and see me if there was a problem - not the best of modern teaching methods! And my drama lesson nearly drove me mad - why are kids so loud?! I actually went back to sleep when I got in at lunchtime - but a 2 hour nap worked wonders and I was atually in a good mood until a few minutes ago (what's with the mood swings, I don't know - I'm only ever high as a kite or completely blank and tearful.)

I went into Milton Keynes late afternoon to find John Lewis - I was given £50 in vouchers as a leaving present from Ponteland. I couldn't believe how expensive it was in there though. I thought it would be nice to get some cushions for my bed - only £25 each! So then I though maybe a beanbad would be cool - £65! After that I explored the picture department - about £40! I even tried dresses - £120, what a stupid idea! I just ended up with 3 very school teachery cardigans from their only casually and reasonably priced bit of clothes section (£20, £15 and £15). They're nice but made me resent my height even more than usual. The sleeves on the size small are past my hands and it bunches at the waist because it's far too long - grrrrrr! You'd think a place that posh could manage a petitie section. Anyway, I probably looked like a right idiot wandering around the shop, picking up random things, gaping in horror at the price and replacing them quickly - surprised I didn't get thrown out for being a commoner who has clearly never set foot in the place before!

I've been trying to find a drama society to join tonight.And a dance company in fact. I know I can't do everything but I just feel the need to do at least one thing that isn't school. I'm loving it but it really is taking over my life. WIth Saturday morning school and Wednesday night duty and seeing the boarders at church and coaching games and helping with the CU and choreographing the school musical there just isn't anything else I do!!

School in general is going well though, I'm really enjoying it. I'm only depressed because I'm tired and planning is taking me ages and I'm very very very behind. Oh well, tomorrow is another day and I will be productive - on what is supposedly my day off yes, but hey.

current mood: lethargic

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